Scientists have recently discovered that sperm don't shoot out of the spigot swimming fast and furiously like Michael Phelps or Mark Spitz. Sperm are mellow until after they are deposited inside the vagina and are washed into the cervix. It isn't until hours later, when they have the woman's egg in their sites, that they switch on the afterburners.
It seems that sperm have little neurotransmitter receptors on their heads which, when activated by naturally-occurring cannabinoids, cause their little tails to go into hyperdrive. Sperm need this burst of speed once they get close to an egg, but if they start swimming too fast too soon, the chances of fertilization decrease.
Cannabinoids are in a woman's oviducts at mid-cycle when she is ovulating. This causes the sperm to speed up in the right place and at the right time. But all bets are off if either partner is a serious pot consumer.
Cannabinoids are naturally present in both mens' and womens' bodies. They are required for proper production of sperm and eggs, for fertilization, and for implanting the embryo in the uterus. Marijuana puts substances into the body that mimic these naturally-occurring cannabinoids.
Now, you would think that the last thing in the world that would speed anything up would be marijuana. But the main buzz-producing element in marijuana is THC, which stands for tetrahydro-cannabinol. It is simply by coincidence that marijuana contains large amounts of a chemical that triggers sperm to accelerate. "Holy wads of white sticky goo, BatMan, does this mean that the same substance that mellows us out when we fire up the Batmobong speeds up our sperm?"
In a male pot smoker, THC can seep into semen and cause sperm to start swimming fast. This can make it burn out before it reaches the egg—like a long distance swimmer who sprints at the start of the race rather than at the end. And if a woman smokes pot, THC permeates her vaginal fluids. It might cause sperm to speed up the moment it's been ejaculated into her vagina, which is way too soon. (This begs the question of whether a guy who goes down on a pot-smoking girl can get a contact high. I don't believe anyone has researched this—officially, anyway.)
Heavy pot smoking can decrease the chances of getting pregnant by up to 50%, especially with male partners who are fertility challenged to begin with. Researchers such as Lani Burkman from the University of Buffalo have also found that men who smoke four joints a week show a decrease in semen volume, while those who light up twice a day show serious changes in semen volume, sperm count, and overall fertility. I would think they would also have trouble holding a job, but wonders never cease.
While reduced fertility isn't such a bad consequence in the vast majority of tweakers, regular smokers should stop lighting up months in advance of trying to become pregnant, since THC can be stored in body fat for up to a year. This will give your reproduction systems a break, as well as helping to protect your baby from growing up in the uterine equivalent of an opium den.
For those of you who smoke cigarettes, the news is worse. The impact of cigarette smoking on your reproductive system can be even more dramatic. Dr. Burkman's research shows that most chronic tobacco users have impaired fertility.
This site is neither produced nor supervised by physicians or pharmacists. We occassionally make mistakes. This information is meant to help inform but not be medical advice. Use your health-care provider as a final source on all matters, especially on those regarding drugs.
