Movie by Moonlight

While some of you who are reading this may have been conceived at the drive in, it's unlikely you will ever go see a movie at one— unless you live in a rare place that still has a safe, comfortable drive-in theater. As a solution to this problem, we have designed a date that captures at least some of the drive-in theater feel without all of the bad stuff.

CURRENT STATUS OF THE DRIVE-IN THEATER

It's not pretty anymore. We've been to a few of the drive-in theaters that haven't become strip malls or fl ea markets. You go with this romantic image of sitting in the car, snuggled up together to watch a good movie. But it usually doesn't work out that way. The sound from the speaker is often crackly, strange people are walking around your car and peering in, the food is terrible and the bathrooms are filthy. Not a happy date in the age of the DVD.

THE REMEDY—YOUR OWN DRIVE-IN IN THE BACKYARD

In the old days, you didn't mind going to the drive-in when the weather was bad, given how the cold invited more snuggling which led to more making out. But when you're putting your couch in the backyard, it's best to take a rain check if it's nasty outside.

Rent two movies that both of you will enjoy.

Move the couch outside and bring out a table where you can put the television and VCR or DVD. Run an extension cord for power.

Set up a table for drinks and food. Include a candle on it that's sitting inside of something so it doesn't blow out. Prepare food and drinks—standard movie fare of popcorn and sodas. Sneak in a couple of beers or wine if you like.

Bring a blanket you can snuggle under unless it's really hot and humid, in which case you'll want to bring out a big fan.

Turn off the lights inside and outside of the house.

Put the movie into the VCR or DVD to make sure it is working correctly. Fast forward past all of the commercials.

Escort your date to the couch, take off your shoes, curl up and turn on the movie. With luck, your television set won't be the only thing that gets turned on.

ALTERNATIVES

Set up two rows of couches or comfortable chairs and invite another couple. For better or worse, you won't have a rear-view mirror that you can look into to see if the couple in the "backseat" is getting past first base and you won't have any car windows to fog up.

For a more accurate reenactment, put the TV and VCR or DVD in the garage, roll down the windows so you can hear the sound or hook up small speakers that you can bring to the car. Watch the movie from the front or back seat, whichever suits your fancy, but don't sit with the car idling unless maybe you're watching "Thelma and Louise."

Or forget the movies. Sit in the car and snuggle and make out for a couple of hours. Bench seats are better than buckets for this kind of adventure.